15 Signs You are a Woman That’s Hard to Love
Being a woman that’s hard to love can bring on a lot of headache and heartaches.
If you’re a woman that’s always in and out of relationships with the men walking away after only a few weeks to a few month of dating, chances are you are a woman that’s hard to love.
Sadly, most women with this problem are unaware of it and end up trudging from one heartbreak to the other, wondering why their relationships don’t last longer than a carton of milk.
I have seen a few of such cases: these women, while being very wonderful, pretty and bubbly, are hard to love and so, have really good men taking a walk after only a short while.
As people, there are qualities we have that either endear us to others or repel them and it’s no different in relationships. Some habits or qualities in relationships will make you really attractive to your partner while others will act as deal breakers.
While each relationship is different and unique, men the world over agree on some habits that clearly are deal breakers and possessing one or more of these will make you a little more harder to be with than the next woman.
Luckily, knowing what qualities are as women will help us know what ails our relationship that way, we can know what needs to be worked on to give us that deeper and more lasting relationship.
Signs you’re hard to love
Here are fifteen deal breakers men swear makes a woman hard to love:
1.A Woman Who is Insecure and Needy
If you’ve ever been around an insecure person you’ll agree it can be a little of an emotional strain being with them. Their insecurities affects every aspect of their lives and soon, even when you yearn to help them overcome it, you find yourself weighed down under the constant baggage of it all.
They get defensive, take every criticism personally, belittle others to feel good about themselves, overreact, play the blame game, need constant reassurance and validation and reject compliments when they get it.
Since low self esteem makes you display attitudes that are detrimental to your relationship, chances are you will end up sabotaging the very relationship over time.
If you are an insecure woman it would be best you if you took the time to heal from your insecurities before going into a relationship as even the most loving and committed of men could get frustrated by the heavy drama low self esteem brings.
2.You Come Across as Arrogant
This is on the flip side of being insecure. Men say women who are arrogant think too highly of themselves and this can be a huge turnoff.
A lot of men say it can be hard being with an arrogant woman who has an entitlement mentality or believes she’s doing them a favour being with them and most say they would walk away if they found themselves in such a situation.
A woman who feels she’s way out of a man’s league will unconsciously carry this notion into the relationship and soon the man will get fed up of feeling he’s been done a favour and likely take a walk.
Some men are hard to get along with and sometimes won’t pull their weight, especially when its urgent they do so. However, constantly harping on that thing that needs to be done can make you come across as a nag and since no one wants or feels comfortable around someone who constantly nags, it might be a matter of time before he walks away.
4.Having Your Head Stuck in the Cloud
I know a young lady who grew up reading romantic novels and came to expect constant romance and chivalry from the men she dated.
She lived in a fantasy world and these men were expected to live up to that fantasy and since even the most chilvarious of men would blanch at constantly being prince charming, her relationships never lasted, with the longest lasting just nine months.
5.Being Hung Over Your Ex
There’s a reason why its recommended you get over an old relationship completely before moving into a new one and that’s because the baggage of the old one can and will snuff the love and life out of the new if carried along.
Being hung over your ex will show through to your new man, no matter how much you try to hide it and since no one wants to feel like a second fiddle it can make your man have q rethink.
6.You are Combative
No one wants to feel they are constantly in an arena and a woman who constantly picks fight over every issue can come across as combative and will likely repel men.
7.You Have Baggage
A woman with lots of baggage can also be hard to love. We all have issues and yearn for that special person whose shoulders we can lean on. However, if you share your baggage too often, especially very early on in the relationship, it can paint you as someone with too much issue and make the guy bail.
A relationship should be give and take and a couple that shares and compromises grow stronger. If you, on the other hard, find it hard to share and impossible to compromise, then it can portray you as selfish and make your man resentful.
9.You Over share on Social Media
We all know that girl or guy whose life is lived on social media. You log in to see comments like “Guess what I served my man for lunch? Fried rice and plantain and he loved it!” or “All men are dogs! I thought I’d found love but I was so wrong!” and you wonder if they have any secrets at all.
A lot of men reveal they share this fear, especially when with a woman who’s job is social media-related or one who just loves it as they wonder if their whole life would become an open book for everyone to see.
While sharing a few things is seen as as being social, putting your whole life out there, is on another level and most frown at.
10.You are Extremely Jealous
A little jealousy is okay, even considered sexy by men and women, but a woman who throws a fit if she as much as sees you having a handshake with another girl or breaks your phone when she sees a seemingly compromising picture on it, can be one men would want to give a wide berth.
This is not in anyway making excuses for bad behaviour in some men, but every situation, even one that clearly shows your partner as guilty, can be handled with a lot more maturity and a lot less violence.
11.You Desperately Want Love
Everyone needs love, however, making this need drive you can lead you to make the wrong decisions, making you even settle for someone just because you’re terrified of being alone. And since everyone wants to feel they are needed for themselves, your man can walk away if he finds you only accepted him to fill a void and not because you found him amazing and wanted to be with him.
12.Giving Your Number to Other Men
Men say they find this habit disrespectful, especially when it happens right in their presence as it can make them feel you aren’t quite down with the relationship and still trying out other options.
As protection, your man could also decide to keep his options open, not knowing if or when you would make a switch.
13.Being Stuck in Your Career
Men say they find a woman who’s focused and ambitious sexy, however, putting career above all others, even love and a good relationship, can be a deal breaker for most men.
14.A Woman Who Isn’t Quite Intelligent
Men love stimulating conversation and a woman who can make this happen will appear more desirable to them..
Intelligence is a great quality in anyone and a woman who knows about the world around her, not just the latest in fashion or the latest chick flick, will appear a whole lot more attractive.
There’s something about a woman who can take the little around her and multiple it into a whole lot more. The reverse is a woman who lives just for the moment and takes no thought for the future. While she might be fun being around, a man would search out a more grounded woman when looking for something more serious.
Most say when they find a woman without the ability to multiple or nurture, they are forced to want to keep searching, even if she has a few other good qualities.
How to Stop Being a Woman Men Leave
The first step to being a woman men would love to be with, is to identify that quality in you (if any) that pushes men away and work on it.
It might help to know that choosing to work on whatever negative quality you have (and we all have some) is usually for you as this will affects other aspects of tour life and end up improving other relationships you have, making you more appealing.
Secondly, you might also want to adopt a few qualities you might be lacking that make people succeed in relationship Again, this is not to help you keep your man, but to make you the best version of you there can be.
Lastly, you might also want to look into loving yourselves, if you don’t already. A confident women is one who accepts herself; flaws and all. She celebrates her strength and while she tries to work on her flaws (those that can be changed), she accepts those that can’t and know it is these strengths and imperfections that make her the unique blend of person she is.